My mother used to say that her mother (my grandmother) had a proverb: “There’s no pot so crooked that there isn’t a lid to fit it.” Interesting! When asked what this meant, my mom would say that grandma was talking about people coming together in marriage. No matter who they are, no matter what their background or situation may be, there’s someone for everyone. I like that, and believe that to be true.
For a variety of reasons, the month of June has long been a favored time for weddings (Why Is June The Most Popular Month For Weddings? - The Bridal Tip). Like many others, my wife and I were married many years ago in this month. Of course, couples can and do get married in whatever month works best for them, be that June or January. Having served in ministry for more than thirty-five years, it has been my privilege and joy to assist many couples preparing for marriage. Preparing for marriage is extremely important. This helps couples prepare not only for their wedding day, but for their entire life together. Although I have used many different marriage preparation materials over the years, I am now using the book, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God, by Timothy Keller, with input and help from his own wife, Kathy Keller. Like so many other things, you can find this on Amazon. For couples who have asked me to officiate at their weddings, I require them to read this book as part of our pre-marriage sessions. It is a wonderful, Christ-centered resource, not only for those who are preparing for marriage, but for anyone interested in discovering more about God’s design and purpose for marriage.
The words found within the marriage service of the Lutheran Book of Worship (1978) are especially beautiful:
The Lord God in his goodness created us male and female, and by the gift of marriage
founded human community in a joy that begins now and is brought to perfection in
the life to come.
Because of sin, our age-old rebellion, the gladness of marriage can be overcast and
the gift of family can become a burden.
But because God, who established marriage, continues still to bless it with his abundant
and ever-present support, we can be sustained in our weariness and have our joy
restored.
These words acknowledge that marriage is a gift from God. They also acknowledge the reality of sin that can undermine marriage and work against that gift. And yet there is hope! God has not given up on marriage because we have misused or abused it. The gift and blessing are still there from the Creator.
It goes without saying that marriage is not for everyone. For some individuals, their calling is to be single rather than married, and the Lord is honored through this. In this broken world, we have to face the reality that not all marriages work out. And when they do not, even under the best of circumstances, there is pain and heartache. No one gets married thinking that their marriage will end in divorce, but it happens. We’ve all heard that nearly one-half of marriages end in divorce. It is an often-repeated statistic; however, it’s not that cut-and-dried. Research indicates that this statistic is nuanced by many things and the actual number may be significantly less than one-half (Do Half of All Marriages Really End in Divorce? | Psychology Today). For those who have experienced separation and divorce, church can be a difficult place to be. There can be awkward questions and uncomfortable looks from others. Because of this, people may choose to stay away. But it is precisely then that the power of God’s healing mercy in Word and Sacrament in the fellowship of believers is needed in the lives of those who are hurting.
In this month of weddings, there is a significant milestone taking place. It was 500 years ago on June 13, 1525, that the former Augustinian monk and great reformer, Dr. Martin Luther, was married to the former nun, Katharina von Bora. Their marriage became a terrible scandal to some, but to others, it became the symbol of what God intended for his people: for man and woman to be united as one within the covenant of marriage. Luther was fifteen years older than Katie; he was 41 and she was 26 when they were married. Though encouraged by others (including his aged father) to marry, Luther did not think this was a good idea. He believed that his life was in danger because of his teachings. He had been excommunicated, and he did not believe that he would live long. Nevertheless, Luther put into practice what he himself had preached to others and was married, defying the rule of celibacy. The Luthers’ marriage and homelife with six children became a model for the Reformation movement, and helped to set the tone for Protestant parsonages and clergy families for generations to come.
The city of Wittenberg, Germany, where Martin and Katie made their home for many years and which became a center of the Reformation movement, is celebrating the 500th anniversary of their marriage this month from June 13-15 (City festival for Luther's wedding). Happy anniversary to the Luthers and to married couples everywhere in this month of weddings!
